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so... where to start. lets see... so i moved, well, "moved" to long island. i took a working student position which then turned into an asst. manager position. its, well, quite interesting. STRESSFUL. but, thats the horse life. i know this well... but what i didnt know, is how much my life would change and who would cross my path...

as you know, well, some of you, before i came here i was engaged to this great guy. hes so sweet and caring, spoils the hell out of me, would do anything, and i mean anything in the world for me. hes such an amazing person. right?? but i dont want to be with him. things were really really awesome the first year, then i dont know. everything he did started to get on my nerves. it started out to be little things and then they just got bigger and bigger. i started to distance myself from him more and more. coming to LI was my escape. i wanted this so bad. just to be away from him for a while. i figured that would make me realize what i was missing, and hopefully bring us closer together, but, boy was i wrong. if anything it pushed us farther apart. and then i met andrew.

wow... andrew. theres just something about him. im drawn to him. just seeing him or hearing his name gives me butterflies. god, its been a long time since i felt that way. no matter whats going on, or how bad things are, just seeing him makes me forget about everything. he can always get me to smile. mike should be the one im talking about here, not andrew. but i dont feel this way towards him. and just that fact that i could even think about another guy has to say something. i think it was at this point i realized i really didnt want to be with mike anymore. it seems whenever im home or around mike, all i can think about is andrew. actually, i think about him all the time. god, this sucks. well, not really... i kinda like it. its been soooo long since ive felt any of these feelings... and i like it.

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January 2008
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